X-Men: Destiny seemed like a novel idea on paper: choose from three newly-initiated mutants, develop their fledgling powers, and fight alongside some of your favorite X-Men or Brotherhood characters. In practice, it feels much more like a horribly written fanfic than a full-fledged, completed video game. If you’ve ever written a Mary Sue character into the Marvel universe, beautiful, young, and naive, yet mysteriously able to join the X-Men after a mere few fights and near-instant mastery of powers, then you’ve probably got a good feel of how the game plays out. Here’s a hint: not very well.
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Review: Hector: Badge of Carnage: Episode 3: Beyond Reasonable Doom
On October 8, 2011
In PC, Review
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If raunchy humor is your thing, then you’ll find plenty to enjoy in the Hector: Badge of Carnage series from Telltale Games. I’m not sure I should even begin to run down the list of completely inappropriate jokes that will fly your way from the start of the third and final episode of the series, but rest assured if you’re the type to offend easily, it certainly isn’t for you. Episode 3: Beyond Reasonable Doom is a fitting end to the story, however, and if you’ve been along for the ride the whole time, you’ll likely be satisfied here as well.
Review: Orcs Must Die!
On October 5, 2011
In Review, Xbox 360, Xbox Live Arcade
With Comments Off on Review: Orcs Must Die!
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Your fortress is under siege by hundreds of bloodthirsty orcs. You’ve got deadly traps, spells, and some beastly weapons at your disposal. What do you do? You strategically place spiked platforms, walls of spears, and break out your crossbow, of course! Orcs Must Die! is an effective my-castle-is-under-attack-by-these-enormous-monsters sim and one that serves up plenty of crafty good fun. As you step into the shoes of a War Mage, a member of the mystical Order, you’re tasked with defending your tower from the Mob, a faction comprised of orcs, ogres, hellbats, and other nasties who barge in any way they can to wreak havoc upon the world. It’s your job to keep them at bay using any means necessary. This quick-and-dirty tower defense game may be a little on the shallow side, but it’s certainly worth your time.
Review: Dead Island
Dead Island: vacationers, bikini-clad babes, and entrails strewn along the beach. Does this sound like your idea of the perfect getaway? Oh, it does? Okay, well, let’s toss in a multitude of fetch quests without any real aim or purpose, plus a veritable cornucopia of NPCs with personalities comparable to cardboard issuing these requests without providing any real sense of belonging. Still sold? That’s what you get with Dead Island, Techland’s zombie apocalypse simulator. If you were drawn in by the heart-wrenchingly beautiful trailer that debuted so long ago (remember the plight of that little girl?) you’re likely going to be more than a little disappointed to find the game is really nothing like that. And that’s okay, but I wasn’t particularly satisfied with the end result, either.
Review: Gears of War 3
Brothers to the end. That’s a tagline I can stand behind. The acclaimed Gears of War trilogy has finally drawn to a close (or so we think, anyway) and the conclusion to the explosive series is bigger than ever: bigger explosions, bigger pecs, and bigger drama. And while everything fits together as one deliciously gory whole, I couldn’t help but feeling as though Gears of War 3 left a lot to be desired, despite its tight controls, concise campaign, and ability to engage. While the conflict between the Locust, Lambent, and humanity has finally come to a head, I just couldn’t shed many tears at the end of the sprawling battle.